long time no post!

I know it's been forever, but it's summer! And I have some HUGE news!

I'm engaged!

Yes, J and I are going to the leap! So excited, and couldn't be happier. It happened on our trip in Italy. We got back this past weekend, and I have tons of pictures to post. I took way too many and I'm still going through them all.

I also got a new job. I am going to be teaching in 2 elementary schools this year. Not the best possible situation, and I'm going to have to dig out a lot of my old lesson planning out. It's been a while, and I'm a little nervous about the little guys. I also feel a little guilty about leaving my current job, but it was time.

I'm looking forward to biking to work (hopefully) and being able to plan things for the long term.

So--- LOTS going on. Busy busy busy... But that's ok, I like it that way.

I will post pictures soon!! Hope everyone is enjoying their summer!

NYC!

So here I am, on an unexpected trip to NYC! I love this place. It's amazing. I've been here about 2 1/2 days now, and I feel that I have very little under my belt. There is so much to see and do, and i wish I could just spend the whole time wandering.

I'm actually here for the Lincoln Institute a National (should be international) Educator Workshop in Aesthetics.... gosh, they have a flair with words. Basically it's educators, arts administrators, college professors, and teaching artists from around the world, and many
disciplines who come and create, and discuss ANYTHING art. It's hands on, very reflective! The workshops are amazing, and the leaders of our workshops are even more so... I love every second of it.

I'm taking tons of pictures and I hope to put them all out when I get home. I can't believe how the time is flying here. It's really good for all my senses, and everything really feels alive for me. There's tons of action, movement and involvement in every aspect of being here. It feels energizing. I don't know how I'm going to be able to remember everything here, but I'm sure trying to document. Probably more than I should. I should take time to observe, relax, and just be in Manhattan,

Tonight I'm off to a concert in central park and hopefully a few lovely beverages in a nearby establishment. WOW! I hope I can carry this feeling in what I'm teaching in a few weeks. It's hard to believe it, but I'll be going back to school in just a couple of weeks. However, I think I have a new skills, and new ideas to pull from.

Now if I could just get over these darn stress dreams.

Off to....

NYC!

I can't believe it. I wasn't planning on a pre-trip before the big trip, but I got accepted to the Lincoln Center Institute. It's a set of art workshops for 5 days. I haven't been to NYC in years, and I've only been once. I'm a little nervous about it, but I think it will be fun. There are 6 of us going from our school district. The only think I gotta say about it, is that we're totally unprepared. After getting all the info about the workshop, I don't think I'll be ready to participate. We were supposed to read a book and some articles before we left, and none of us have those. I even tried to order the book on line, but it's too late! Oh well, we'll wing it. But I have a feeling that this is going to be more than we all anticipated.

We even are going to have to have to write a paper, comment on line, and keep a journal.. WOW.

But I'm still looking forward to it. NYC will be fun and exciting. I'm even looking forward to the train ride.

And then it's a few days home, a few loads of laundry, and some major re-packing and we're off to Italia!!! Yippee!

This summer is really turning out to be busy and exciting.

Hey! It's me!

On Etsy!!!

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=27234488

Tell all your friends!

Ahh, school districts

Well, they're up to their old tricks again. First I got hired for the new are position, then it became a 1/2 time position, then maybe not. So now I'm being re-issued a contract for the detention home. After moving through the stages of grief in a period of 24 hours, I have finally come to accept that I WILL be doing another year at the detention home.

Of course it's going to turn out to be one of those things where, they are going to make a final decision in August, and well, it'll be too late for me, because we're in school already at the D-home.

So I'm shifting my mindset again. It'll be ok. I really hope that the detention center becomes a dictatorship... but I'm afraid with all the former military members on staff now, that's exactly what it will become. -le sigh-

In other news, I have a fantastic opportunity to go to NYC this Sunday. It's for the Lincoln Center Art Institute. I get to go with a few other teachers from our district. It'll be fun. 6 days! That's going to be a long time away from home... But I'm so excited. I think this will be good for me, and I get to see and hear from other teachers from all over. I think it's a full day 9-5, but I'm totally excited to be in a huge city and seeing all the sights, and experiencing so much.

Then I come back and 4 days later we leave for Italy! Phew!

So the world is good. Everything is fine. I just need to figure out how I'm going to teach next year. With the restrictions on so many supplies at my school, I'm going to be so limited. I'm thinking about teaching comics. Lots of drawing.....though.

Ahh- Happy summer everyone. Hope you're enjoying.

Oh- and P.S. I'm getting busy on my etsy sight! I'll let you know what will be on it, and when I have it up and running-- hopefully by the end of tomorrow.... So excited to just be out there. Now for the website..... hummmmm....

coming soon..

A new art position. I'm headed back to elementary school this time. It should be a good change. I'm looking forward to the change. I've taught a few years of elementary, and I pretty much know what to expect. I really just hope that it's the right direction for me.

Done

Interview..check
Organize art closet...check
Recycle... check
Organize paint supplies....check
Finish assessments for half my classes...check
Organize leftover photo copies...check (wow, I never do that)
Last Monday with students... check

Now I just hold tight for a day (hopefully) and wait for the answer back from the interview. Then I'll know where I'm at and maybe-sorta relax about it all.

Glass of wine in hand...check.

Home Stretch

2 more days with classes, then grade day, and then.......?????? I have no idea. Our official last day is June 30th, but we have no classes. I guess that means clean up? Who knows. My room will be spotless if I come back and use it, or if someone else is here.

Today is also the day of the transfer interview. Wish me luck! I have everything ready. I know it's just a transfer interview, but I just wanted to be totally prepared. So I updated my resume, made sure my portfolio is in some sort of order..... Now I just have to be able to answer questions in a coherent way.

Ha!

Well, happy summer everyone!!! I have just over a week until I can start enjoying the feeling to the max!

The beginning of the end.

Well, we're coming to a close over here at the D home. And just as the year started.... it has ended. I saw one class today for 20 mins. I just can't wait to be done this year. It could be the last one here. I applied for a transfer, and I have an interview with that principal on Monday. Elementary school will definitely be a change, and I'm not sure it's totally what I want, but I figure it can't hurt to wait out in a more cohesive place.

The D-home is definitely going through some changes. They have a new assistant superintendent, and he's definitely more authoritarian. I hear (rumors) that he has a military background and is going to treat this place more like boot camp. I'm in favor of some consistency and some regimented behaviors, but it would be hard for me to feel comfortable in a place where there are going to be "drill sergeants" yelling and giving orders (I picture some drill sergeant type character saying drop and give me 20 as I'm teaching about perspective or something).

Who knows what will happen? I wish that the position at the high school hadn't been dissolved. There's a slight chance that this will be just some sort of a stepping stone.

Part of me thinks that I would just make a better mentor to a kid who was from the D-home. I could really connect to them by volunteering at the center. I feel like I'd be filling a void.

Summer vacation is on it's way, and that is a thing of joy. I can't wait to be eating gelato while meandering around the Venetian streets. I'm so looking forward to a change of scenery, culture, and food. I can't wait! It's going to be great.

So- with only a few school days left, keep your fingers (and toes) crossed for me on that interview, and that we all make it through the final days of the school year unscathed.

The big push.

Things are getting a little tougher around school these days. I don't have a count down calendar going yet, but I think I might need to make one tomorrow. I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel yet, but maybe after this coming weekend I will.

I haven't heard about the transfer position, but I'm sure within the next week I'll know about an interview. I'm still on the fence about it, but I guess either way I'll make it work. I wouldn't mind being able to walk out the door of the detention center for good after this school year. It would be bittersweet, but also welcoming to know that I wouldn't have a huge weight about my shoulders day in and day out.

I'm not sure there's a perfect job out there for me, but I know this is not it. As an art teacher it's thrilling to have a small setting, but it's so transient you can't really get anywhere. I feel mostly like I'm on a bed of quicksand. Every time I make a move I slowly get pulled under. Not a good feeling.

Oh the joys of being a teacher, so up and down. It's the end of the year, I'm bound to be feeling a little tired. Unfortunately, I think it's a bit more than that this year.

Any who-- things to look forward to:

ITALY!

So excited, I really am trying to spend more time thinking and planning for that. Now that most of the planning is done, I'm really ready to go now. But, we have a little over a month before our plane across the Atlantic. I still don't know much Italian, but maybe if I make some flashcards I'll start memorizing some phrases. We have cd's, but haven't both found the time to sit and listen to them... opps, maybe I can upload them to my ipod and just have it going for the entire plane ride... Ha!

Can I just say?

THE DECEMBERISTS COMPLETELY BLEW ME AWAY!

ANDREW BIRD COMPLETELY BLEW ME AWAY!

BOTH AMAZING! GO SEE THEM IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE!

YOU WON'T BE DISAPPOINTED!

Yes, I am yelling at you... you must must see them..........

Concert Time!

Yay, I'm so glad this day has come. Finally I get to see the Decemberists and Andrew Bird. I can hardly stand it, I hope this day goes really fast. I have to leave work on time today, get home to take care of the dog, and then head out to pick up J at work. Driving into DC won't be that bad, since I'm going the opposite direction. But I have a feeling driving through DC may be a bit of a challenge. The concert is all the way out in Columbia, Maryland. Which isn't that bad in theory, but factor in the beltway of traffic, and things get a little hectic. I hope we make it there on time. I don't want to miss anything. Plus, we have actual seats. We're not on the lawn. I'm hoping our seats are decent, but I really have no idea!!!

YAY! I hope this day goes fast!!!

Lucky 13?

I guess when there are 13 days left of school things might get a little bit crazy. Like, for a few days your classes maybe wonderful, focused, managing themselves, and then just when you think the end of the year is going to end peacefully, positive, and happy.........

dun... dun............duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun.

Yep, that's what happened today. My last period of the day, 10 minutes to go before the end of class and a kid throws a chair across the room, throws hard punches at the staff, has to be restrained, but then the staff has to literally tackle him to the floor, and 2 staff basically lay on him on the floor underneath another table.

In the meantime, all my other students, step out of the way, while their mouths are gaping open. I couldn't believe that the table broke, and supplies went everywhere. For some reason, the other students handled it all really well. I immediately went for the 2 pairs of scissors that were out, and got them safely in my desk.

Why would this kid do such a thing? Well, he was mad at the staff for taking a "symbol", which basically takes away a privilege. So he kept talking about it, and the staff gave him another warning, which means you go to your room NOW. He didn't want to go to his room. Well, now that's exactly what he'll get. 72 hours alone in his room.

There hadn't been something that had happened like this in a while in my class. But you really never know when it could happen. You can't get too comfortable here, and I guess that's one of the reasons why it's so difficult to work in a place like this. You want it to be consistent, and challenging, and inviting, but then something like this happens and you realize a kid could do anything at any moment. Although, most kids don't. He's really an exception to the rule. Even kids that have done something violent won't ever do something violent in here. Just today I have a kid who I knew was brought up on 3 charges with a knife, and I gave him a glue gun to work with. I've also given him scissors.

It's a delicate thing. These kids can be ticking time bombs and our job is supposed to be about giving them some skills for their life. However, those needs are not being met here. Most kids don't even have a counselor, just a parole officer. Don't even get me started on the detention staff, they're so passive aggressive and inconsistent.

All I can do is what I do.

Thinking

So, there is a chance to leave my current position, but I'm not too sure what I should do. I've been working at the detention home for the last 3 years, and while there have been some good moments, there have been a lot of things that I've had to overcome to make my classroom work for me. (and sometimes it still doesn't)

On the plus side -- which is the most important -- the students. I love them, they love my class. On the minus side, it's so transient. Another minus, there is a constant struggle between the staff of the D-home and school staff to manage the classroom. I appreciate that they are there for my safety, but I definitely would run my classroom differently without them. It sometimes causes a lot of problems because the d-home staff can be extremely passive aggressive, and that doesn't work for anyone. On the plus side, I love the teaching staff. We get along, it makes it more supportive, however I feel a bit isolated because we don't really work together where curriculum is concerned (good and bad).

Minus - it's been a roller coaster of a ride, and I feel burned out. Coming in and out of a jail everyday is a little bit like being an inmate. I do get to leave, but I hate feeling on edge. Because it's been said to us that safety comes first, We are always reminded about the dangers of this and that-- especially with art (although I still use sharp objects in the classroom).

So- the age group is great. I love teaching HS, but I can't create a program. It's hard to get their work shown, and it's hard to do lengthy projects.

It's draining. I know nothing will change with the Juvenile Justice System, and kids will always be rotating through this place.

So--- what do I do? Well, there's another art position open in my district. It's for elementary school. I don't know how I feel about that, except that I've taught elementary before. It's usually not my favorite age group (kindergarten is hard for me), but they are fun. The second thing is it's a small school. I think I really like the idea of teaching at a smaller school. Only, I would still only see my students once a week....which stinks.

The school is extremely close to home... I could take my students outside, on field trips, I could have more at my disposal... It sounds good so far-- except I worry that it may look like a step back for me professionally. Sometimes when people see a resume like mine, they think twice. I haven't stayed in one age group in my 10 years of teaching, but I don't really think that's a bad thing. In fact I've progressively spent more time at each school I've been at. I'm not sure if I'll ever find the perfect fit, but I honestly can't imagine doing more than 1 more year at the D-home.

So I guess right now I'm trying to weight my options... I'm leaning towards Elementary again. Ahhh, I don't know.. I really don't.

Bummer

Man, I overworked a painting today. I absolutely hate it. I kept trying to rework it, and to no avail. I completely destroyed it, I knew I should have stopped at a certain point, but kept trying to add to it. Layer after layer it just looked worse and worse.

Oh well, at least it was a very small, it was kind of like a test run on a new idea.... so no real harm done, just sometime spent. I did enjoy the time, however. I set up my drawing table on our enclosed porch, and the weather was just perfect. So I really loved being semi-outside. All the natural light that comes in is really nice.

I'm a little bummed, especially since I spend more time on preparing stuff for my students and less time on my own artwork. Times need to change, though. I've been saying this all year long, but I really have to make a promise to set aside time for artwork. I need to try to work my ideas into smaller pieces. I just don't get the results i like when I work small....

Really? That much longer?

Oh my, still 4 more Mondays to go. I hope I can make it. It seems like all my teacher friends are getting finished up already. But our last day with the students is June 24th. I think it will help to map out the final month of my classes, and I can just keep pushing through. I don't want to do anymore huge projects. Maybe if I keep it to small things, the time will just fly. It's hard, because my kids are always coming and going. It's hard to know where they're skill level is at, and most of the kids who come in at this point are done with school. So the effort will be close to nil.

Oh well, the weekend is shaping up to be wonderful. I've gotta get my little art corner set up on our enclosed porch and make sure I use it at some point over the long weekend. J and I also plan to get out and about, do some hiking at a near by park. I hope so, if the weather is anything like today (which it's predicted to be just so) it'll be wonderful. I love being outside! Maybe a picnic?

Happy Friday to everyone out there tomorrow!! Enjoy!!!

Notes on a "sleep study"

This illustration is funny.

These are just words I jotted down from last night. I went into a sleep center at about 8:30 last night and came out of the sleep center at 5:30 this morning. I've never done anything like this before, and it took me a long time to finally get one done.

For those of you who do not know, I've always struggled with getting sleep. I have the stereotypically symptoms-- can't fall asleep and can't stay asleep. But, this last year it's been very very bad. I haven't really had a good sleep in over a year, and before that it went in cycles. I never really did anything about it until this year. And I've tried everything from warm milk, yoga, natural remedies, to medication, eliminating caffeine, and wearing myself out! Nothing has brought back a normal cycle of sleep. So I figured that even though my insomnia is probably anxiety related, there might be something else going on. So with the help of my doctor, she recommended a sleep study, and that it might tell us something.

So- here you go:

-Strange electrodes
-Camera watching me

- TV on (Idol on, Adam sucked, but so did the song)
- Sleeping alone

-Closed door, strange it's not my own

- Sheets unfamiliar, not my scent

-Low buzz from the lights

-Bad landscapes on the wall

- Wish I had brought my pillow

- Is this camping?

-Two books beside my bed

-Teddy is my technician

-Wonder what other channels I get, probably just basic cable

- Not exactly a hotel room, and definitely not my home

- Can I turn out my own light?

-Can I get up to go to the bathroom?

-Thank goodness for a personal day tomorrow

- Maybe 30 electrodes? I lost count

-Did I dream? I can't remember

It was a pretty strange experience. I wasn't really comfortable at all, but I guess I did manage to sleep there for a little time (however, they did have me take my meds.). The worst part was all the electrodes. They had to put them on with some kind of gel, and it was really hard to get out of my hair. I think this is one out of 2 or 3 sleep studies depending on what goes on with the information. I kind of wanted to see what it would be like if I hadn't taken my meds. But I'm almost positive I wouldn't have had one wink of sleep.

One of the funny things about the night was that I could tell someone was in for sleep apnea, because I could hear her snoring in the room right next to me. It was very loud.

The technicians were really nice and friendly. They definitely know what they're doing. They had me do a series of eye moves in the beginning and end of the study. I had to keep my eyes open, blink really fast, move my eyes left and right, and hold my breath. I also had to sleep on my back, which I hated. I always sleep on my side or even the front.

J dropped me off and picked me up, and we both immediately tried to go back to sleep when we got home. I ended up getting a few more winks when I got home, but I'm still tired from the whole ordeal.

I'm not sure if this will really help with anything, but maybe they can give me some kind of sleep schedule or something, to get my system back in check.

Tomorrow it's back to school. It's so nice to have a day off midweek. I feel very naughty, but I definitely couldn't have made it to school today.

All I can say..........

........is that "Lost" better have an actual ending. If it doesn't I'm going to be really mad at the writers next year.

That's right loyal fans, one more season to go. As if they couldn't drag it out any longer. I will not give anything way... this season was crazy though... WOW.... Tons of different things going on, and working up to this season, they surely led us to believe certain things... But that's what I love about the show. If you watch, you will be rewarded. If you don't, well, then you're not getting the whole picture. You have to remember stuff from seasons' past, and you have to try and guess where they could possibly go with the story line.

I really just like how it's playing out. Certainly you can enjoy it on just an action/survival level, but there's also lots of underlying stories, beliefs and philosophies going on...

One of my favorite shows ever. One more season to go.

NO, say it isn't so..

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090511/ap_on_bi_ge/us_farm_scene_preserving_native_chile

A sad story that seems to get written every year. This is probably one of the things I miss most about New Mexico.... It's the flavor. It really truly is. Nothing else like it, and so addicting.

Photo catch up.

Ok, I'm really bad about posting photos. These are a few from Easter weekend. J and I went down to Charlottesville to his mom's house and a really nice time. A sunny day, and tons of kids running around everywhere collecting plastic eggs filled with chocolate and treats (I should post a few of those hunting ones).


Jarle and I. His mom lives in a really beautiful area overlooking a valley. I love it!!!

The valley.

Who can resist the Cadbury mini eggs?? -not even the cute little chick.